12/16/2015
Here is where you will learn my story.....and I'm putting under this tab because my own transformation is what brought me to my passion.
I left home at the age of 14. My parent's were and still are devout Jehovah's Witnesses and I was a teenager that wanted to live a normal life, and that included being bad. I ended up sneaking out with a boy one night, and well...the neighbors were watching and called my Father. Being way too afraid to go back home, I ended up running away, only to be caught early that morning by the Cops and drug home to be interrogated and sent to school.
After that, it just wasn't the same. I was fearful, and just didn't want to be there. I ended up ditching school with a friend one day and was too afraid to go home, so I called my Brother. My Brothers were also sent away very young...ages 16 and 17. Once they left, everything changed for me. My Brother at the time wasn't in the best condition, and addiction had gotten the better of him, but he was determined to take care of me anyways.
Later that day, I went home to face my parents, and tell them I wanted to go live with my Brother, only to find all of my belongings in trash bags on the front porch.
Shortly after moving in with my Brother, I dropped out of high school and we moved in with my oldest daughters family, where I ended up pregnant within a few months. The relationship was extremely rocky, and this is when I really began learning the wrong things in life, about myself, and the self loathing began. Being such a young Mother, I developed severe anxiety, at one point taking a few too many pills to try and end it and shockingly, no one even noticed. I loved my daughter so much, but I was also young, and wanted to BE young. Those two did not go hand in hand, and my daughters Grandmother started making threats to take my baby away. I literally felt ALONE. ABANDONED, with no one to turn to and I started battling depression.
At the age of 16 years old, I was put on anxiety and depression medications. Over a span of 12 years, I had developed a serious addiction to those medications. I had also developed an addiction to alcohol and started smoking tobacco at 14, on top of them. Through all of my failed relationships, motherhood, and just trying to grow up and do the right thing by taking the city bus with both babies in tow to get my GED only to fail, all at the same time, my anxiety and depression progressed, and the Doctors would just switch medications when I would adapt to the last.
From 2007-2009, I attempted to take my own life twice. I was so anxious, my insomnia would keep my up for sometimes a week, and I just felt like I was going to die. They then put me on and anti-psychotic drug called Seroquel to help me sleep. It didn't work, even at the highest dosage, and this medication is what I ended up using to end my suffering.
Some of you may have heard the quote that says "one day, something just clicked, and she just decided it was time to change, so she did", well....that's exactly what happened.
I KNEW that it was life or death for me at this point, not even seeing that my life wasn't ended for a reason. I was so exhausted with my dependence on things to make me happy. I was exhausted with not being the Mom, to my very core, wanted to be for my babies. It was THEM that gave me the little hope I had. It was THEM that would give me the drive to change because THEY deserved a good Mother, a SOBER Mother. And so that is when my transformation began.
I spent almost 6 months detoxing from all my medications. Coming from someone who was pretty thin most of her life, had gotten up to 190lbs(I'm 5'4) and had high blood pressure from all of the medications, alcohol and smoking (2 packs a day).
I started walking on a treadmill for 5-10 mins everyday. It was not easy for me...I was winded very quickly and would have to stop and start frequently...but I kept going. By this point in my recovery, which wasn't very far in, something in my mind started to shift. For once in my life, I had a vision. A vision so clear, that any time I wanted to give up, it popped up in my head and pushed me to work harder each and every time.
My vision was of me, healthy, happy, and free. I was a good Mom. One that my kids weren't ashamed of and who they looked up to, and wanted to be like. I was THERE mentally, and remembered all of the event's in their lives, that didn't involve being drunk, or in a foggy haze from meds. I was back to looking the way I did when me and my husband first met. The way he fell in love with me. Jealousy was no longer an issue for me and I visioned a less insecure person, that had a HUGE passion for motivating and helping others, in some form or another. At this time, I didn't realize the path I was now taking was actually leading me to my passion. THIS, is what kept me going. My mind started shifting even more once the meds started leaving my body. It became very clear, I was on the right path.
I'm not going to say, everything changed and it was all butterflies and unicorns, hell no, I still had some serious issues going on. But the shift had brought me hope, and faith that I might actually be able to pull this one off. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but my decision was already made.
It had become try and give it all you got or die.
I continued on my fitness journey, pushing a little more each day. I came across a home workout program called P90X. I KNEW what I needed to do. I started and stopped, just like I had to on the teadmill, but again, the vision was clear for me. I had also started focusing on my portions and what I was eating....which was a lot of JUNK! But I knew nothing about clean eating, except that veggies were the obvious healthier option compared to what I've always ate.....NOT veggies!! By the end of 2011, I had lost a total of 87lbs. I had renewed hope and faith in myself. Gained a little more confidence, even though I still had work to do on that. I went from 190lbs to 103 in a little over a years time. BUT, I was still not healthy. I was still not eating OR drinking the right things, and because of this, and my drinking, I had a serious binging issue. Stashes everywhere, and after my decision in 2012 to continue on my journey forward and ditch the alcohol and smokes, I yearned for information.
I started researching the internet for anything health and nutrition related, and I fell in love. I started following fitness and health on FB, which is where I ran into a Beachbody Coach and ended up becoming one myself, which only fueled my passion even more. I ended up enrolling at IIN and became as Health, Wellness and Nutrition Coach, as well as enrolling at NASM to become a Certified Personal Trainer. I LOVED, and FELT what these things did for my life, and I wanted to learn so much, and BECOME what I loved so much....so I did.:) I'm not done either....
THAT is my story on how I found my passion....my purpose, and how I was mean't to help others in their own lives. I've since moved on to starting my own Personal Training business, and have big plans for 2016 as far as Health Coaching and furthering my education goes.:)
When I signed up to be a Coach with Beachbody, even though I'm not active with this route at this time, I was urged to make a transformation video, so I did. It was made in 2013, but it's still part of my story. Hope you enjoy it!
Click here to watch...
My Story...
I am now currently running my own Personal Training business from my home in Tucson, Arizona.
The rest is history, that I'm sure you'll hear more about at some point...;)
Much love,
Wendi Brungraber
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